I didn't ask for it to end; all I asked for was a little more time before we tied the knot. I had concerns I wanted to talk about, including his frequent meltdowns during times he claimed he was asleep.
Instead, I got a breakup followed by two days of drunken namecalling as well as other things...sure, there were "sorrys" in there, but a simple "sorry" doesn't make up for what he put me through.
Now, I have a three-month rule. If someone can stay with me for a full three months and prove trustworthy - THEN we can talk a deeper commitment.
Yes, of course, I miss him. It was another situation where the good times were damned good. The problem was that the bad times were DAMNED bad. I got crucified for not complying with some hidden agenda that demanded the wedding occur NOW despite any doubts I may have. Hell - I wasn't allowed to have doubts. Just who does this guy think he is that I'm not allowed to have doubts? Anyone would have serious doubts after the way he kept questioning my commitments to him, whether I loved him, kept insinuating that I would just up and leave him...claimed that he cried every night because I wasn't physically there (hey, how about we enjoy what we DO have?), and spent hours crying on voice when he should've been the happiest guy in the world?
After the third or fourth time, it got hard to believe the meltdowns happened while he was asleep.. He seeemed to be a fairly miserable fellow for someone who was collared, blood-bonded, partnered, and about to be married. Yes, he has health issues but he couldn't seem to make up his mind just how serious it was - and Goddess forbid anyone else should have issues.
For someone who makes a point of putting other people down for causing drama, he caused quite a bit of it, especially with me, and that's what led me to have doubts and ask for a postponement of the wedding.
I got a voice mail from him saying that he hoped he'd not royally screwed things up. I chose to answer him in a message. His reaction was to cut me off and say I wasn't taking my share of blame. Blame? Uhhhh.....I asked for a postponement. I didn't ask for a breakup. He initiated the breakup.
The sad thing is I did love him - what I knew of him. Now that's over.