Yesterday turned out to be a terrible day for me as I was let down in a big way by yet another person. Thanks to her I refuse to ever consider adopting anyone under adult age. It's just too damned much. I have too many other things demanding my attention. I do not have time for someone who is consistently making demands on me and, when I can't always fulfill them, complaining to me and accusing me of rejection.
Today was a case in point. A real concern has arising amongst clan members concerning child avatars, specifically those well under teen age - like toddlers. Both the main clan sim and mine, the sister sim, are rated Adult, and they're rated that way for a reason. The majority of the users are adults, who like to behave like adults. That means language and partial nudity and the possibility for sex in public, though that usually doesn't occur. It's only recently that the question of underage children has come up. The King's daughter is a young teen and she pretty much sticks to specific places when she signs on. Another guy is a teen but he's more around 18-19, so that's not a problem. The clan Master Builder is also a teen, albeit again, 18-19.
The problem became acute when I adopted a toddler, who happens to be a Bloodlines Queen of her own making - aka she bought all her souls.
Things worked out pretty well at first though she was told she couldn't attend clan events unless she switched to an avatar that could pass as a teen or young adult. At first, she did that, opting for a petite fairy, which is perfectly acceptable. Then she went through a series of avatar changes, at first trying to get away from her previous mother, then deciding to go back to the original, which is the account she met me on. In the meantime she was transferring 400 souls from one account to another nearly every single day. I finally told her enough was enough and I wouldn't tolerate her doing it again. She returned to her original account, then opted to ditch the fairy altogether.
By ditching the fairy she limited herself to the rare event where it was clear there wouldn't be any nudity and a minimum of adult language and subjects. That excluded her from most events, something she didn't like, and did complain about.
You'd ask, why didn't I take her to any of the kid-friendly parks? Well, first of all, she didn't like other toddlers. Didn't matter if she never met them before, she just didn't like other kids, period.
She wanted to be involved in adult affairs but always came up against the "no kids + sex" rule. Then she encountered people on the clan sim who were scantily dressed, which is their right, and she started fights with them, instead of going the other direction. As a result she decided she didn't like them and wanted nothing to do with them, which only complicated things further.
Then the complaining started in clan chat and led to a blowup between me and another clan member. As a result, that member's liege and I entered into a voice conversation with the aim of finding a happy medium for all. This talk took quite awhile, during which she was talking to her minion and I was talking to my little daughter. She succeeded in getting her minion to calm down, but the more I tried to talk sense into my little daughter, the more obstinate she got. Then the accusations started flying about how I didn't want her and how I favored other people over her and how dare I log off early to read a book and try to get to sleep earlier....and then I just had enough. Enough of the accusations. Enough of this young woman refusing outright to do anything to help the situation, expecting everyone and everything else to change for her. I burst into tears, got really upset, and cut her off. By the time I did so I was in a major meltdown. Again.
And again, I had to decide for my health instead of in favor of another person. She is going to liege to another lady who already has a toddler and a partner. I'm wondering how that will work out, because she didn't want me partnered and doesn't like other kids, especially toddlers. Oh well. Not my issue anymore.
That might seem cruel, but when anyone pushes me against a wall, then pushes me over it, they leave me no choice but to decide in favor of myself and relative peace.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. I made the radical decision to do things that make me happy. Too often have I sacrificed time and energy for another at my expense, hurting myself in the process.
I did my best to work things out with this young lady but she couldn't meet me in the middle, nor could she stop lobbing accusations at me - and the LAST thing I will put up with is emotional manipulation. Of course she ran to all kinds of different people and told her sob story and tried to get them to get me to reconcile with her, and I told each and every one of them what happened. After getting several IMs and realizing that she was going to use anyone with a sympathetic ear, I made a rare and somewhat inappropriate statement to clan chat basically saying she and I were no longer together, it can't be reconciled, talk to her if you want, but don't ask me to reconcile. Thank you.
Then I got angry all over again for her causing a huge amount of drama just because I refused to speak to her anymore.
Now it is said and done, and I have to admit, it is a great load off my mind.
Just a few days ago I had to get rid of yet another moron of a minion. This one originally lieged to me because he couldn't afford to feed himself and wanted to get his family back together. I made it clear to him that as long as he was lieged to me, I'd make sure he was fed, and also that his family would be a part of my clan. That went good the first month, but then the second month came and suddenly he and his daughter were talking "clan" versus family group, they were calling him King, and suddenly my clan was the "sister clan". The more I heard, the more alarmed I became, till I finally took it to our King - who very promptly backed me in putting that horseshit down. When I returned and told him to cease and desist or he was welcome to leave and refound his clan, I got a big argument - and soon enough, the man found him on the other side of my mute button, and off my minion list.
Not only was I told that he has done that all along with our King's knowledge (false) but he was going to continue to do it and to hell with anything I had to say about it. He showed no respect for me as a liege, much less anything else. In fact I'd go as far to say he showed a rather misogynistic attitude, which isn't unusual for a guy accustomed to playing Gor. Since he thought I was either crazy or paranoid, both he and his daughter went to the King, who pretty much told them both the same thing I told them, and cut them off. Then he came back to me, and within half a dozen exchanged messages, he was back on my mute list.
He owes me 2495L for HUDs I bought for his minions. I also gave him free housing, and when I had to move him into a smaller apartment because I had to take the other building down to save prims, he dared to complain about the size. He was living on my sim for free and had the audacity to bitch about going to a smaller apartment. He didn't even bother thanking me for setting down copies of the major furniture pieces from the other building. This was a man clearly intent on using me as much as he possibly could, then cutting loose to do his own thing.
I don't think so. Let him do his own thing NOW.
I am nobody's caretaker. I am nobody's doormat, and I'm certainly not anyone's bank. The kids I still have are all adults and know how to act like it. I am never taking on another toddler, and I am not taking on any minions who need as much financial help as this other guy did.
Bloodlines costs money. If you can't pay it, don't get involved. Also don't look to me if you need someone to entertain you. I flat out won't do it. Call me a bitch but damnit I'm not here for that and others will just have to get used to it.